“Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place.” Billy Crystal
Lots of comedy routines about guys wanting sex all the time while their ladies are not nearly so interested have gotten big laughs through the years. But setting aside the jokes, is there an actual sexual frequency that works best for both sexes? According to new research, there just may be a magic number for couples, but what that number is might surprise you.
The study, which was conducted at the University of Toronto Mississauga in Canada, found that for most people in lasting relationships, having sex once a week is ideal for their satisfaction and well-being.1 Muise, Amy; Schimmack, Ulrich; and Impett, Emily A. “Sexual Frequency Predicts Greater Well-Being, But More is Not Always Better.” Social Psychological & Personality Science. 18 November 2015. Accessed 22 November 2015. http://spp.sagepub.com/content/early/2015/11/16/1948550615616462.abstract The subjects were 25,510 Americans between the ages of 18 and 89 who responded to questionnaires in 1996 and 1998. Approximately two-thirds of the participants were either married or in a long-term relationship.
Among this majority who had more committed romantic involvements, an active sex life resulted in a higher happiness quotient. But more sex was not necessarily better. Their happiness ratings appeared to hit a ceiling at once a week intimacy. Levels of satisfaction steadily rose as sexual frequency increased, but only up until it reached once a week; at that point, happiness hit a plateau.
The surveys filled out close to two decades ago were selected for use because those were years that the questions included clear information about volunteers’ relationship status. Since it is entirely possible that things have changed somewhat in people’s mindsets on sex and happiness since the mid- to late-1990s, the scientists added a more recent component to the investigation. They set up an online trial involving 355 male and female participants and asked questions about how often they have intercourse and their overall well-being. Interestingly, the findings were exactly the same: satisfaction was maximized at sex once a week and leveled off with greater frequency than that.
The researchers also wanted to focus on whether having more sex would make people feel happier than being wealthy. They measured reported levels of satisfaction with life in couples who had sex less than once a month against those who had sex once a week and found the difference was greater than that of couples earning between $15,000 and $25,000 annually versus those earning $50,000 to $75,000 a year. In other words, sex might just matter a lot more than money to most people, and the once-a-week crowd is most satisfied. What’s more, when the scientists controlled for the length of the relationship, age of subjects, and even gender, the model of peak happiness with once-a-week sex held steady.
Next, the investigators considered a separate national survey–from a third, unique population–that concentrated on questions about happiness, sexual frequency, and relationship contentment. They analyzed this data set, and determined that the regularity of sex was associated with seven percent of reported overall happiness and satisfaction in a romantic relationship.
That is quite a bit of evidence in favor of a once a week romp between the sheets. But of course you have to do what is right for yourself and your partner. Some couples might thrive with a daily dose of sex while others are most comfortable having sex one time a month or so. No one needs to shoot for a specific number just because that’s the average that makes the majority of people happy; we all have our own preferences.
The primary thing to remember is that sex is an essential part of a healthy relationship. It’s an expression of intimacy that helps the bond between partners continue to grow. But if your libido isn’t quite what it used to be, don’t necessarily blame aging and being busy with the kids. A drop in your level of desire may be caused by hormone imbalances–especially testosterone, no matter your gender–that tend to increase as we get older; but a natural hormone balancing formula restablishes everything to perfection once again. So take care of your body and make the time–however often works for you and your significant other–to maintain your sex life, and you will be happier in your relationship and with life all around.
References
↑1 | Muise, Amy; Schimmack, Ulrich; and Impett, Emily A. “Sexual Frequency Predicts Greater Well-Being, But More is Not Always Better.” Social Psychological & Personality Science. 18 November 2015. Accessed 22 November 2015. http://spp.sagepub.com/content/early/2015/11/16/1948550615616462.abstract |
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Western scientists have to learn many things from India in terms of sex life. The more the sex, the more man becomes a slave of sex! Indian yogis lived a very long life controlling their sex instinct. It is said in the Upanishads, “Brahma charyen tapsa devata mrityu mupaghanata” ( Through practice of celibacy and meditation, elevated souls have defeated death). Any body can achieve youth and long life easily, if one could control his instinct of sex or regulate his sex life, but it is difficult for any person to achieve youth and long life, who practices irregular life style. Alcoholic drinks, non-vegetarian diet, and practicing of irregular life style definitely pollute a man’s mind, and he cannot think beyond sex and his mind indulges always in sexual thoughts, he becomes a slave of sex. Sex was considered a necessity in human life only for procreation and not for unnecessary over indulgence.If one goes to Khajuraho, and looks at the statues in sexul postures deeply, he or she will understand, those figures tried to depict not pleasure associated with sex, but realisation of higher realms in one’s life by merging one’s self with the higher self.
Western scientists tried to depict sex as only an object of pleasure, hence so much of indecency or stigma associated with sex life, and the role of a woman was reduced to that of a pleasure object. Most of the crime against women in the society is the outcome of this outlook towards sex. Western scientists never understood, sex can be divine also. The lesser the sex, the more one can achieve vitality and can easily retard old age.
I suggest, the western thinkers must read ancient Sanskrit literatures, if they want to learn the real character of sex, only studying sex life of a few couples will not enhance their knowledge about sex, because these couples have never been taught what real continence is!
A wife in India, was considered a real life partner, who stood beside her husband during every thick and thin of his life, therefore, in ancient India, divorce was considered unthinkable in a couple’s life, but see the prevalence of reverse situation in Western countries, divorce is frequently applied phenomenon in everyday life. The reason for this is simple, because marriage or live-in-relationship has only one meaning that is to obtain pleasure through sex. Less people know a very important fact related to India: a wife was always preferably kept on the left side of her husband, because a wife was always considered closer to one’s heart, therefore, a person who is closer to one’s heart could never be thrown away from one’s life. Death could only separate a couple.